Quotable QuotesMemorable quotes and quips
about espresso from the forums
The Announcements above the forum listing frequently contains "quotable quotes" nominated by Team HB and the membership. Entries in the announcements are limited to recent quotable quotes; below is the unabridged collection with links to their source in the forums. We hope these nuggets of wisdom and amusing quips will lead you to a deeper understanding of the art of espresso.
One more time with feeling
"Guys maybe stop beating a dead horse. I already agreed twice that my statement was wrong, but I am happy to agree to it a couple more times if you insist." --Nino (coffeeOnTheBrain), James Hoffmann's $$$ grinder reviews
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times
"My best shot to date was from my La Pavoni Pro. My 1,000 worst shots were from the same machine." --Almico, Slow pull - 1 minute - excellent?
Try to keep espresso in perspective
"It's worth mentioning that hanging out on a site like this, you'll find plenty of over-the-top concern about minor details." --Dan Kehn, Reason for cooling down boiler?
Well, technically coffee is a fruit
"The 'I want coffee to taste like coffee' is a silly thing to say since coffee tastes the way it does because we process it a certain way." --John, Why is everyone looking for fruits in coffee?
Lovers of channeling, rejoice!
"The spout somewhat minimizes the evidence of that channeling while a bottomless portafilter reveals it in all its glory." --Steve Meyer, Do I need a spout?
Tell me the espresso machine you own, I'll tell you who you are.
"I've found it's become easy to tell which machine someone owns by the comments they make." -Dave S., How to tell which espresso machine someone owns...
The true answer is there's no true answer
"Espresso is about enjoyment. Some take enjoyment in thinking about Rome when they walk into the kitchen. Others find joy in how well their machine performs in temperature tests. There is no true answer." --Roeland, What's really the difference between espresso machines?
Completely understandable for this crowd
"It's funny, I think I've spent more time reading and thinking about this [espresso equipment purchase] decision than with my last car." --Stephen Thorne, Lelit MaraX vs good single boiler espresso machine
"The Italians don't need it, they invented espresso. The French don't need it, they're better at everything food-related. The English don't need it, they drink tea. The Dutch don't need it, as we know it better. The Germans/Swedes need a manual because..." --Marcel, The surprising things you can learn from a user manual
Don't judge a book by its cover
"If you want espresso porn, grind coarse and overstuff the basket. The shot will pour and look gorgeous; the taste ... not so much." --Jim Schulman, Am I sentenced to a life of single-dosing voodoo?
Average isn't half bad
"Milk is your best friend for less impressive shots." --Randy, I accept espresso that's only "OK"
I don't want to become a barista
"The jump from no-fuss to gimme-fuss [espresso preparation] takes on greater importance as one moves to more delicate roasts. Maybe I've got simple tastes, but I tend to prefer more traditional roasts that also happen to be easier to pull consistently without much fuss." --Tom, "But I don't want to become a barista"