RANT: How to stop people buying me coffee? - Page 2

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ethiopie

#11: Post by ethiopie »

HB wrote:Or about the giver, e.g., "That was very thoughtful of you! Thanks for thinking of me."

A few times, I've received similar gifts; if the giver pressed for feedback beyond "it was nice", I delicately point out that coffee, like bread, goes stale [surprisingly] quickly and that regrettably it was past its prime. This conveys the hint that coffee may not be a wise thank-you gift without casting too much negativity on friend's kind gesture.
That's what I usually do as well. But unfortunately, it's the wrong approach with people who think they are coffee-experts but really aren't. They usually have a FrancisFrancis and they'll give you a shiny box with Illy pads or whatever, because they think it's the Apex of the Coffee Pyramid. I never know how to react. It's always interesting to have a cup of Illy - always a moment to ponder Unanswerable Philosophical Questions, like "Why is it so popular? Even among preground espressos it's fairly uninspiring." - but I'm afraid the gift-givers can see on my face that I'm not going to consume the whole box.

By the way: does the opposite sometimes happen to you? A friend who lives in Holland once gave me 125 g of coffee - I don't remember the origin. I suspect it was something very special, but I never got it right. I'm afraid I wasn't worth the present.

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RegulatorJohnson

#12: Post by RegulatorJohnson »

Speaking of illy. I include them in the pool of gift coffee givers.

You usually get the awesome "gift" of a can of pre-ground when you buy the art cups.
...uuuhhhh thanks??

i have a few cans of it in my basement, untouched, still in the box from the late 1900's. I found a can in some pen test cups i decided to crack it open. It smelled ok in the trash as we sat at our garage sale.
2012 BGA SW region rep. Roaster@cognoscenti LA

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iginfect

#13: Post by iginfect »

Pre-ground coffee is excellent mulch or fertilizer for your garden.

Marvin

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Psyd

#14: Post by Psyd »

This is exactly what re-gifting is all about. I've saved a number of donations for a friend that was in remote China, and only had a passing acquaintance with good coffee. There are enough people that are really happy about coffee that's boiled in aluminium and sits waiting all day.
And if you accidentally re-gift it back to the person that got it for you...

That's how I arrived at 'Babbie's Rule of Fifteens'. Explaining to folk returning from coffee-centric areas of South America, Central America, Jamaica, etc., that if they were to do it again, to bring greens, citing the very nature of vegetable matter to go bad fairly quickly after 'cooking'.
It usually clues them into the fact that it's going to be pretty difficult to get coffee for me, and that there may be some other chookie that might do. Or, if they're determined, at least I'm getting greens!
Espresso Sniper
One Shot, One Kill

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