I have been working on an pneumatic optical sorter. When it detects a sub par shot a blast of compressed air blows the shot into your crotch. It is based on Pavlov's research with dogs. If you do not get sprayed with your espresso shot when a proper shot is pulled the positive reinforcement (or rather lack of negative reinforcement) will cause you to pull a perfect looking shot every time. It may taste like road tar, but at least it will look good. Now if we can just learn to taste with our eyes we wont have to concentrate on flavor, just aesthetic.

tekomino wrote:... you don't even have to taste espresso. Analysis AI engine is that good!

Dennis, thanks to you, all those "thought experiments" we've all argued about are about to pay off and we are finally approaching the espresso ideal. AI's ability to simulate the result enables theoretical drinks and hypothetical perfection, with no real espresso to get in the way.

Oh wait ... the mermaid already brought us all that. Curses - spoke too late.

cannonfodder wrote:I have been working on an pneumatic optical sorter. When it detects a sub par shot a blast of compressed air blows the shot into your crotch. It is based on Pavlov's research with dogs. If you do not get sprayed with your espresso shot when a proper shot is pulled the positive reinforcement (or rather lack of negative reinforcement) will cause you to pull a perfect looking shot every time. It may taste like road tar, but at least it will look good. Now if we can just learn to taste with our eyes we wont have to concentrate on flavor, just aesthetic.

This is my vote for for Best Comedy Writing.

phillip canuck wrote:This is my vote for for Best Comedy Writing.

I don't know why you would mock Cannonfodder's research like that, but I saw some of his lab tests result and have read a white paper he wrote and it was considerably impressive.

LaDan wrote:...This is the brand, if you need to show it to the person at the store.

"I need one of these makeup cases. It's for my espresso machine. No.. Really. It's not what you think.."
Ya, that's going to happen.

Randy, that is exactly what I was thinking. At least the one I use is made for a car!

sweaner wrote:Randy, that is exactly what I was thinking. At least the one I use is made for a car!

Putting makeup on while you're driving is dangerous.

Per the Guidelines for productive online discussion admonishment Stay on topic, enough "comedy" attempts... thanks.

cafeIKE wrote:I'm waiting for Eric's Fibre Optic Camera with LED illumination adapter

tekomino wrote:That's nothing, I am working on shot video analyzer that captures in HD and analyzes your naked extraction in real-time...

LaDan wrote:Actually if you look again at my picture you'll notice the 4 round and 1 long chambers at the bottom.

cannonfodder wrote:When it detects a sub par shot a blast of compressed air blows the shot into your crotch.

Anvan wrote:AI's ability to simulate the result enables theoretical drinks and hypothetical perfection, with no real espresso to get in the way.

etc. etc. etc...

LaDan wrote:Putting makeup on while you're driving is dangerous.

Further silliness will be deleted without warning.

Not to be a buzz kill here, but I have small piece of mirror polished stainless that works perfectly and will not break or crack. It's about 4" x 5" and it can be easily cleaned.