Turns out I've read you wrong! You're right, you've got 4 grains of hardness (or whatever, strips are a PITA to read and probably not the most reliable things in the world). As you also observed with the multi-strip, you have 80-125ppm alkalinity.
That's big-time scale water. I think the whole-house softener you're using probably DOES have a mixing valve on it. I mentioned that they're rare, but only in small softeners... they're pretty common on auto-regenerating whole-house softeners. You probably have yours set somewhere below the "maximum softening" setting, right? These systems have that feature because super-soft water can be a bit unpleasant to use day-to-day, particularly if you aren't used to it. However, for the espresso machine, you probably ought to crank that all the way to maximum softening if you wanna prevent/minimize descaling.
I think I've said this elsewhere, but you need to read the Water FAQ a few more times. The parts to focus on are the first few sections on defining water hardness (alkalinity vs. mineral/general hardness), how scale forms, and measuring hardness. If you skim this stuff, it will go right past you and you'll be very confused--I know this firsthand, and you can discover my own embarrassing confusions in some of my oldest posts to this site.
For instance, you could use Jim's graph to observe that with 100 mg/L alkalinity and 70 mg/L hardness, you'll get 60 mg of scale buildup from every liter you pump through the machine, if your boiler's at 125°C, or 1.3 bars. You can punch in Jim's logarithm-heavy calculations and see what you need to be at for 100 mg/L alkalinity and, say, 120°C. By my calculations, you need either -15 mg/L or -7 mg/L hardness, depending on whether you use the normal or high-range alkalinity equation. I take it this means you need to run your softener at max.
There's no way to reduce alkalinity with a cation softener, which is what a salt-based ion exchange softener is. You would need a different filtration solution, or a plumb-in. Ken Fox will tell you, and I think he's probably right, that you're going to get perfectly awesome coffee running 0 mineral hardness and high alkalinity like you'd have with your current softener on max. This is likely your cheapest (and totally fine) bet at this point.




